Tanker is somewhat of a legend in this biz. His association with top line companies like: Adult.com,Lightspeed,Cumonherface and others gives him experience in the biz few can compare to. The legend is not just due to work. Anyone that knows Tanker has a Tanker story from a convention. Talking to Tanker, you can tell he likes to have fun and he likes the people he's around to have fun. An army man where he drove tanks; hence the name, from there he made his way into adult and left stories about him almost everywhere he went. Telling Tanker stories is something Tanker does very well, so I'm gonna get Tanker to do it here.

Pictures complements of Fubar - check it out the photo archive of all webmaster events!

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GFY Ambush Interview thread on Tanker

Question #1
How do you make pancakes with an iron?

Well it should be how do you make flat iron pizza but since I know how to do that I am sure pancakes cant be that hard. First you need a hot iron and some Tin foil place the pancake batter into a pocket made of tin foil and seal it the next step is simple Iron the foil ! I am not sure how good they would be but if you need to reheat pizza this is the way to do it when all else fails just wrap it in foil and set the Iron to Cotton no steam.

Question #2
How many girlfriends/boyfriends have you had while in the industry?

I dated a few people like 3, however I am engaged to Ellisa and we are going to be married in June and I cannot wait. She is my support and I am hers. We do a lot of work together and I could not be happier.

Question #3
Did you ever kill anyone with your tank in the army?

No I never killed anyone with my Tank. I did have a lot of artillery drop on my M1A1 while in training The damn forward observer was not on his mark. Its was pretty close we thought for sure we were going to be in a world of hurt fortunatly for us Tanks are not penetrable by Training rounds. However all your belongings are kept strapped to the outside and I lost everything I had for the 3 month trip. They replaced my uniforms I was just sad to lose my Walkman have you ever sat in the desert with nothing to do for hours on end and not have any music? IT SUCKS.

Question #4
What's your favorite story from bootcamp?

Well I went to Bootcamp twice the first time I had not even finished highschool I went in the summer between my junior and senior year! the first time was Army Boot Camp in South Carolina The Platoon I was put into had a set of identical twins that were on the buddy program so they shared a set of bunkbeds. These two guys were professionals when it came to assisting each other. If one got in trouble as was told to do push ups they would switch out while the drill sargeant wasnt looking They got away with it for about 5 weeks untill they were caught in the middle of a switch Damn I have never seen 2 guys sweat as much as they did for the rest of that day That's just one of many.

Question #5
Why did you get into online Adult?

Well I got into it because I wanted to make more money. After a few years in the Military I was still only bringing home about $1500 a month for 60 to 80 hour work weeks. I had 2 small children and thier diapers cost more then I had. It left me with no disposable income. I was allready selling prepaid legal, giving away free pagers ( making money on the monthy bills ) and some other junk on the internet. One day Eric AKA Red Eyes said hey check out this place I found I am making a shitload of money and he referred me to Porn City. I started reading over the resources and I havent turned back!

Question #6
Who were the first people you met/knew in the industry?

Here is a word of advice Pick up the phone and talk to your sponsors, Talk to the people you deal with on a day to day basis. If they help you make money Talk to them on the phone or meet them face to face. The first person I met in this industry was Eric AKA Redeyes I actually knew him befor the industry we did some non adult mainstream stuff together Then It would be the guys at Porn City Mayor, Crow, Joe, Paul That was where the industry did a lot of biz back in the day.

Question #7
How do you do a head on colision with a jetski in the middle of a lake?

The better question is how do you avoid death when you become entangled in a Jetski collision in the middle of a lake! and not a small lake either we are talking I was several miles from the place we rented the damn things. steve lightspeed decided to come out of a canyon and spray water on us as he buzzed by. unfortunatly for his wallet the jetski didnt turn as tight as he thought it would and he launched his over mine. Ripping off the mirrors and throttle on mine and punching a lot of holes in his.I just happened to jump off last second to avoid being crushed by his ski Damn you should have seen the look on the ladies face when we finnally returned them even better to see what steve paying for 2 destroyed Jetskis. We had a good time and I dont think that will be the last time you see me and Steve riding Jet skis together in fact I am sure in a few days you will see us riding in Jamaica together.

Question #8
What's your thoughts on drugs and alcohol and use of them?

Well I dont drink a lot and by that I mean I dont drink on a reglar basis maybe a few nights a month and usually only at shows. Red Bull is my choice of drink and you can mix it with Vodka, Captain, Jeager, or your favorite liquor Drugs, I have tried a few some are interesting some are down right strange and some I cant believe anyone even attempts to take I grew up in a household with a drug addicted single parent I did not even touch touch a drug until I was in my mid 20's I think that if you are going to do them you better have some seriously strong will. you have to be able to walk away and return to reality. If you can't do that then its just not something you should even try.

Question #9
Why did you leave Adult.com?

I left Adult.com to open my own consulting company.

Question #10
Steve Lightspeed credits you for bringing Lightspeedcash to a whole new level -- what were the early days like?

When I first went to work for Steve it was in a rented one bedroom apartment and everything took place there from content production to building the websites It was as grass roots as you could get. Me and Steve work well together we can finish each others stories, and save each others lives! Working with Steve taught me a lot about myself and the ability to really run with ideas and make them happen! It was fun to take a little company that was unheard of and turn it into the king if its niche. We did everything by the seats of our pants it was all trial and error and when we made mistakes we were fast to correct them and try agian. It was a lot of fun working with Steve and Rochard they are two of my best friends to this day. Unfortunatly I dont get the chance to see them as much as I would like to but thats all good Me and Ellisa I am sure are going to move into steves guest house for a week or two soon and spend some time with them.

Question #11
Why are you in Florida? Toronto?

I am in Florida because the weather looks like this ( CLICK HERE ) And I am in Toronto because that is where my Fiancee lives, so I spend a lot of time there. and in June I will be making it my permanant residence.We will of course spend a lot of time in California, Florida, and Arizona when its cold and there is snow on the ground. I dont mind the cold but I prefer to go to the cold when I want to be in it, not be in it just because its the way it has to be. fuck that's why they made Cheap flights to florida and internet jobs.

Question #12
Why do people say "what happens in Curacao stays in Curacao?"

What happens in vegas stays in vegas What happens in jamaica stays in jamiaca I have heard at every trade show what happens [INSERT TRADESHOW LOCATION] stays in [INSERT TRADESHOW LOCATION] so I would say look at any trade show and your bound to find out the answer to this one.

Question #13
How many conventions do you attend a year?

Now its only a few a year like 5 however when I was doing the Lightspeed Road Show it was as many as 1 a week there was a time when I didn't miss a single event unless it was because I was at another event I will be in Jamaica next week for the www.wypd.com gathering and I look forward to doing business with everyone that makes it out.

Question #14
Why did you leave Arizona?

Leaving Arizona was a tough one. The weather is beautifull in the winter and I left in December. I had been there for 3 years entranced with the beauty of the southwest. However it was Ellisa in Toronto that stole my heart and really changed my mind. At the time She was working for a company that would not let her work remotely. So the only way for us to be together was for me to pack up and move to Toronto. It was the best move I ever made in my life. I got there in the dead of winter and it was really fucking cold. Snow everywhere. I hadnt seen snow in like 4 or 5 years and for the next few weeks all I did was shovel the stuff. I did enjoy it though that was my first winter out of the southwest and it was fun This winter me and Ellisa packed up and we came down to Florida one winter in a row is enough I am enjoying our long hours in the car together creating our own ideas and turning them into reality Its amazing how much you can create when you are locked in a car doing 80 on the highway for 8+ hours of travel

Question #15
What kind of degree do you have? Talk about your educational experience.

I have a degree in Computer Information System from CSU Chico. Chico was an awesome school to go to. I think my time in college really transformed my life. Chico has a rep for being a party school and indeed did live up to that while I attended. My freshman year dorm life was wild and crazy. We partied and drank a lot. One Thursday night I was coming back from an evening class and all my friends at the dorm were already drunk and hanging out. I made the mistake of playing catchup and going too far too fast. I took 7 shots of bacardi rum in 30 minutes and it fucked me up. I kept drinking Southern Comfort when the bottle of bacardi ran dry. The next memory I have is puking my guts outside the dorm. After that it's being woken up in a hospital by two nurses. I got really sick and couldn't stop dry heaving. Someone called a non-emergency ambulence out to see me. They said they woke me up and gave me all kinds of tests (asked me my name, how many fingers they were holding up, where I was, etc.) and also monitered my vital signs. Everything was fine but I was told that as they were walking out the door I started dry-heaving in my sleep. Since they had come to check me out they were liable for me and refused to leave without me since I was dry-heaving in my sleep. That's how I ended up in the hospital. When I woke up I had no clue where I was and my eyes followed an IV bag and it's tube all the way down to my left arm. The first thing I asked was how drunk was I last night? They explained to me everything that had happened and asked me if I had a number of someone that could get me. I gave them my friend's number and they left the room to call him. I remember sitting there and looking accross at the table and noticing my shorts and thinking to myself they must have taken them off and set them there. Then I noticed my boxers underneath them on the table and got curious as to what I was wearing underneath the hospital bed sheets. I pulled up the blanket and looked down to see, much to my disappointment, that I was wearing a diaper! I instantly ripped it off and reached for my boxers and shorts. After that pricey experience I got more cautious about my drinking. I still get drunk now and then but don't let myself get that out of control. My friends all said that I was hilarious and kept them in stitches all night from laughing so hard. For some reason people really like to see me get inebriated.

Question #16
Are you rich? Do you fly first class?

Monetarly Rich? I dont think I have reached that point My life is Rich though! Do I fly First Class depends on the airlines and where I am going do I fly to EU first class? no Sometimes from Toronto to Phoenix I do though

Question #17
Have you ever gotten a dog or cat intoxicated?

Only if it drank my spilled redbull and vodka.

Question #18
What did you do at the beginning of your online career.

I built galleries and I built them while sitting on an M1A2 Abrams Tank in the Army it was cool stuff but when I got deployed I didnt have anyone to stay behind and take care of things so it was frustrating to build up a lot of traffic and then lose it all everytime that I was deployed.

Question #19
Why are you going to Costa Rica?

Well one of our really good friends Scott called us up and told us for our wedding he would buy our flights us to go on our honeymoon as a gift. I was floored and so was Ellisa. I didnt know where I wanted to go at this point so I started to look around, I was actually reading someones thread a few days befor about Costa Rica and I had talked to Mike Hawk at Smashbucks about Costa Rica and all I heard was good things So I told Scott Costa Rica and the next thing I know I get an Email from The Airlines. Scott is the man he not only booked us tickets he booked them non stop and First class. For that Scott I thank you very much you are a very good friend and have been since the day I met you... Thanks buddy for those of you that dont know Scott here is his website you can check it out http://www.sleazydream.com So we are looking at doing some cool stuff in Costa Rica. This place looks awesome. http://almondsandcorals.com/ IF you have been there and would like to share you secret spots with us we would like to know about them

Question #20
Discuss this nightclub in Toronto run by 'dirty cops'.

Damn you just come to toronto and Ill take you to all the places that everyone has shown me Toronto and the people that are there are awesome. Everyone I meet in Toronto is kick ass.

Question #21
Don't you get tired of moving from company to company and not settle for one?

A lot of it is do you fit with the company and where they are going! I have worked for several companies, I some day would like to just open my own program I have Ideas pouring out of me I just never had the financial backing to make them work PROPERLY! I have worked for a few companies and when I have left usually it was just a matter of not being able to work with that company at maximum capacity. I have done consulting for a lot of small companies and I still do while holding a full time position with someone. some of those deals you never hear of and never will. The ones that you do hear of usually they are bigger deals that take more of my time and I become a contractor for them. I have left a few positions and 90% of the time its becuase of a lack of communication. some people are hard to work with remotely. I have worked for some companies in both capacities in the office and out and its a totally difernent world even when working with the same team. somtimes it just doesnt work out and usually its not anyone persons fault its just a matter of some people are not used to working with remote employees and it causes communication issues. sometimes it can be fixed by making some minor changes in the day to day operation schedule and sometimes it cannot Do I get tired of moving from company to company? Yes and No YES I do get tired of it becuase I put a lot of work and effort into creating things and learning the ways of the company only to find out its just not going to work. NO I dont get tired when its things like 3 month contracts I get hired to come in and do a task build a program or create a sales force something to that effect. I get paid well to do it and when my contract is up if there is nothing else needed of me I grab some more contracts and help out new companies learn the Jedi Art of adult webmastering.

Question #23
Um, can you explain what your doing in this picture?

Thats Bubba LOL.


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