One of my best friends in the world, Sweetums is the affilate/traffic manager for Lightspeed. She has an extensive background in search engine work and is connected to key players in game. She's on the who's who's in online adult today. Get to know her.
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GFY Ambush Interview thread on Sweetums
What is IBS and how does it affect your life? How long have you had it?
Man, you just had to start the ambush off with the ‘shitty’ question…no pun intended (you'll all find out why...) I’ve had IBS – otherwise known as “Irritable Bowel Syndrome” – since roughly the age of 19. The most current figures show that approximately 35 million Americans are affected by it. In Canada, they place the figures at about 13-20% of the general population with more women being affected then men. It’s the 2nd leading cause of work absenteeism next to the flu/cold. Some people experience IBS as an episode. Something in their life – more often then not that’s an abnormal increase in stress (although some studies have been shown that it can be triggered by infections and viruses) – that triggers their intestines to go out of whack and triggers IBS. Generally, those episodes pass (with or without the person’s active intervention), the person’s intestines return to normal and they go on with their life. Then there’s another group of people, more in the minority, who never really recover from that initial episode. I fall into that category. I’ve had IBS chronically now for 14 years – it’s something I’ve come to live with almost daily and I’ve found my own ways of dealing with the symptoms. A good day and it’s confined to first thing in the morning – when it’s not so good it means a day of abdominal discomfort, loss of appetite, the need for a super comfy toilet seat, and morphing into ‘bitchytums” hehehe Dealing with this can be a pain in the ass (yes, both literally and figuratively…I crack myself up… ), but it’s really helped me appreciate certain things…like being relatively healthy, knowing what feeling hungry actually feels like, figuring out what’s really important to me in my life, and taking the time to really savor a great meal...every freakin' bite – those are things I wouldn’t change for anything.
What did you study in university? Does it relate to anything you do now?
Ahhh…the other life… I obtained a BA in Criminology and a Master’s in Applied Criminology – I started my PhD in Sociology several years ago when I moved to Montreal, but ended up putting that on hold and stepping away (more about that in Question #8). You wouldn’t think that degrees in either of those fields would relate directly to working in online adult traffic management. Nothing could replace the experience I gained by just starting to work in and learn about the online adult industry, but I always figured that all my learning experiences (academic and those life throws at you) would come in handy at some point. What I took with me from my academic training has, oddly enough, proved to be really useful. I came from a pretty off-center Criminology department…was studying sex work and the sex industry, while at the same time finding myself in a statistics-oriented work environment. At the doctoral level…well, many aspects of sociology are right in line with marketing – you’re constantly looking at the behavior patterns of groups…and, you learn pretty quickly that “sex” – that basic human need whether it’s to get it, adore it, control it, condemn it, whatever…motivates and directs social structures and social relations.
Hey twinkle toes, do u and u'r partner wear leotards when go to arthur murray?
Yeah I’ve got a fantastic selection of leotards and a bunch of those g-string body suits…along with leg warmers and some very fashionable multi-colored headbands…it’s very very “FlashDance”! I look good, but my guy looks so freakin’ hot in that get-up…it would make you cry….hell, I think combined we might just give Juicy a run for his money LOL
Were you forced to take piano lessons as a child? Do still play the piano today?
Holy flashback…short answers to this double-barreled question – Yes. Not much. In the event that anyone would be interested in the longer version...let me set the scene…. We’d moved into a new home and the former owners had left behind a massive upright piano…they also left behind a professional sized pool-table. My folks, being the practical folks they are, figured there was no reason for that piano to go to waste…so one of their kids was going learn! My oldest sister got out of it being “too old” to start, my brother got the pool-table, and sweetums got the piano. Only catch…we couldn’t quite afford private lessons. So off I went twice a week to what were known as ‘public’ lessons. Me, at 9-years old, with a group of no less then five 6 or 7-year olds, playing “3 Blind Mice”. I hated it – almost every minute. Mrs. Crabtree (yes, that was her name!) was a witch of a woman who scared the bejeesus out of most of us, and would rap our knuckles if we didn’t hold our hands in form. Add on top of that the fact that the piano at home was located in the basement, and I was convinced that something very evil was lurking in the laundry room – the “evil” would change form…it was a witch, a ghost, a monster, Damien the son of Satan living in that room…which made practicing a complete terror and which might explain my aversion to laundry now ;) After a couple of years of that, I was ready to quit – my mom bribed me…she asked if I would be willing to try a year of private lessons and, if I didn’t like it, I could quit! Since I’d never been given an option before on anything, I figured I wouldn’t pass it over LOL ? Next thing I knew I was sitting at this beautiful piano with an young, energetic teacher who actually loved music – completely changed my whole experience. She let me pick my curriculum, she’d tell me all kinds of stories about the composers and the time periods, she’d play for me…and she wasn’t just good…she made music breathe. All of a sudden I wanted to go to class and I wanted to practice. And, even though I realized shortly thereafter that, at best, I was only a proficient player I kept taking lessons for many years – even paying for them out of my own part-time job money. I just really enjoyed it, and it turned me onto all kinds of music I wouldn’t have ever been exposed to otherwise. As for now, it’s been a long time since I had a piano at my disposal…still play occasionally when I’m visiting the folks. Something I’d like to pick up again someday
Have you ever been strapped to a bed?
(I can't believe Sleazy posted those damn pics!) Ok...Question #5 - the expanded version. Don’t believe a person can say they’ve lived if they haven’t been strapped to a bed at least once. It was June '04 and my good friend, SleazyDream, had convinced me to attend the Cybernet Expo show in San Diego. A ticket was on its way, he said -- the plan was to meet him in LA, hang with friends for a night, and then drive down to the show with AaronM. I remember vividly having a great dinner with Aly & meeting Mark from Cybercat for the first. Then it was off for some chillaxin' time at the hotel. The next morning we all got up and were goofing off together -- once someone sees my bedhead it's a given -- and there were these cots in the suite that had straps on them so they could be stowed standing up with the mattress. Someone, I can't remember who, thought it would be just HILARIOUS to take some pics of me looking passed out standing up, strapped to the bed!! So in my morning haze, I agreed. Had a good chuckle about it and thought it was over...but, oh nooooooo...no way. By the end of the first day of the show I had people I didn't know coming up to me saying, "Ooooooo you're the chick who got drunk and got strapped to the bed!" Given the fact that I'm not a huge drinker, I found this really funny and decided to just go with the flow....told them I was taking up too much room so AaronM and Sleazy decided to just prop me up and put me out of the way
Why do you like tattoos so much? would you ever get one?
Maybe I should qualify this…I like good tattooing – what I’d consider skin art and that comes out of quality, care and artistry. I’ve seen plenty of hack jobs that have just made me cringe, and I’m old enough to remember when tattooing started to be more accepted and when a lot of guys decided to get the Tazmanian Devil tattooed unto their asses. I think tattooing is one of those really personal forms of self-expression and I like to look at it as living art. Would I ever get one? Yes. I’ve come *this* close before (hold index finger and thumb about a smidgen apart), but the week before I was due to go in I had this really odd moment when I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror coming out of the shower – I realized I was a kind of blank slate and that my reason for getting the tattoo (basically, a dumbass) wasn’t really a viable reason to change that state. If the time comes that I feel that there is something truly personal and unique to my own experience that I’d like to capture and take with me permanently then I’d be very open to doing it – just hasn’t been the “right” time yet.
What kind of car do you own? Pics.
I’ve been a pedestrian for the last 10 years. Living in the core of a city that has some kick-ass public transportation meant that I never really needed one. However, recently we bought a brand-spanking new car – it’s been 2 weeks, and the dealership not only hasn’t received it, but they don’t seem to know when it’s coming in. So I’m not going to say what it is or post a pic – just in case I jinx it and we end up having to use our 30-day out-clause ;-) I do promise though that once I get confirmation that it’s in, I’ll post a thread with a pic.
Why did you stop your PhD studies? Too dumb to finish?
The simple answer was academic burnout. The more complicated one is the way a bunch of different factors converged together to create that reality. Looking back now with some distance, I can see that I started the damn thing way too young. I simply hadn’t lived enough life outside of academe to deal with the stressors or pressures that I had ahead me in a doctorate. Funding was tight and it was a constant juggle of trying to find part-time or contract work that would support me while giving me enough time to devote mentally to my studies. I got about 2/3 of my requirements done and did well, but then I hit a wall – I couldn’t absorb anything. I’d read an article and, at the end of it, I couldn’t remember a thing I’d read. It felt almost like my brain was over-saturated – very odd sensation and more then a little disconcerting. I tried to fight it…tried for almost 6 months, and then I woke up one morning with a real feeling of calm. I realized that, simply, I wasn’t happy. I was tired of being a poor student (like the I’ve-got-8-bucks-to-last-me-3-days broke). I was tired of the circus that can exist in the ivory tower, and of a lot of the covert bullshit I saw in that realm. I loved teaching, but I never had any dreams of being some internationally renowned researcher. Most especially though, I was tired of putting my life…tired of putting living on hold. I realized that I was the only one that could change that. It was more then a little scary to decide to switch gears after so many years, but that’s what I did. I haven’t had a regret since. Perhaps I’m too dumb to finish, but just maybe I learned something really important in all those years at school – like not being afraid of change and not investing in something that isn’t giving you anything back.
What's it like to work for Lightspeed? Is it true all Lightspeed employees have to fail a drug test or they get fired?
Well, you know…it’s been really tough…. With the whole…working with, bar none, one of the BEST teams around and being made to feel like family since day 1, getting to promote a great quality product and dealing with a fantastic affiliate base, having a boss that shares his ideas and vision, being given the opportunity to travel and represent a company that stands for honesty and integrity…yeah, that’s been REALLY hard to deal with heheh ? In all honesty, Steve and Shannon Lightspeed offered me an incredible opportunity when they invited me to join LightspeedCash. We work hard, we play harder – and I’m forever grateful for all of it. As for part 2 of the question…all, I can say is…I haven’t seen a pee cup handed to me yet
How did you get into the industry?
Well after almost 7 years of working exclusively in the academic realm, I was rusty on the whole going out and getting a job in the “real” world thing. I wasn’t sure of where to start and had no idea how I would be able to sell my skill set to anyone. So I started networking which led to a very odd phone conversation with a social acquaintance that was one of these semi-retired, multi-millionaires that had several different business ventures going. The next thing I knew I was meeting with the head of marketing of one of his companies – it just so happened to be a company that ran several adult online paysites. The company focused almost exclusively on obtaining its own internal traffic through different paid traffic sources – mainly CPM and PPC search engine campaigns. My very first task included writing search engine titles and descriptions – for over 20k keywords! At the end of it I was wondering if I’d remember how to write “come” as “come” and not “cum” J From there I moved on to harvesting and hand-editing more extensive keyword lists. I became more involved with the design department with various marketing projects. And, by the end of my time there, I was running and managing my own dedicated campaigns. I found it was work I actually enjoyed, and the more I learned during my time there, the more possibilities I found that this industry held for me
How did you meet your husband to be?
As strange as this may sound…and as unlikely a cupid he may be…Dugmor was actually the person responsible for my meeting my guy I was sitting at home on a Thursday night just over 3 years ago, day before Valentine’s day actually, and at around 1130pm my cell phone rang. It was Dugmor…on his way to his favorite waterhole and stripclub, Downtown. I was in pjs and didn’t want to have to get dressed, but Dug insisted and I all I could hear was a jumble of voices yelling “Come on sweetums!!” So off I went to the meet the boys at Downtown. That’s where I met my love for the first time – we got to chatting and I was really comfortable in his company. He found me on ICQ even though I’d given him the wrong number hehehe Next night he invited me out for dinner – been together basically ever since He’s one of the greatest joys in my life and if I haven’t said it before… Thank you, Dugmor
Did you and Sexyscribe have any adolescent girl on girl action at camp?
Ahhh…for those who don’t know SexyScribe and I have been friends since our early teens - almost pre-boobs... Now let’s see…it started off as a summer like any other. Two girls burgeoning on the brink of womanhood – that time when all body parts defy gravity…ahhhh! There was playing soccer in tiny hot shorts and tight tank tops, frolicking in the lake in itsy bitsy bikinis, and nights filled with giggling and talk of boys. Little did they know that this was the summer when innocence would be lost and they would be forever changed through that one hot, steamy, wet night…when an innocent pillow fight became a tickle fight…which led to so much more. It became the summer of Sapphic love…... Ok, now I hope I’ve sufficiently fed everyone’s fantasy…fuck no…it was CHURCH camp…what the hell is wrong with you people?? Hehehe
A night at the Bistro with Lulu, "Monkey Girl and Monkey Boy" Who the fuck are they??
Ahh Lulu…now this is a flash down memory lane It all began as a fun evening out as a group of four. It was Lulu, myself, Chad who was a dead ringer for Judd Nelson in “The Breakfast Club” and Marty otherwise known as “Sideshow Bob” because of his hair…all of us in a somewhat altered state Where do we end up? At a club called “Le Bistro” – we’re thinking it would be a good place to get our groove on. Walk in and it takes about 15 minutes, a trip to the shawarma stand, and a Monty Hall moment in the bathroom to realize that it’s Industrial Night – they’re blaring Nine Inch Nails across the club. Lulu and I decided to venture out to the dance floor…the floors thumping and the lights are flashing and in mid-thang-shakin’ I catch a glimpse of something off in my peripheral line of vision. “I Want to Fuck You Like an Animal” was playing over the speakers and, at almost the exact same time, Lulu and I turn around to catch what I swear, on all that is good and decent in the world, were two distorted-looking primates getting’ down in the corner. My only saving moment was when I realized that Lulu had seen the exact same thing… help!!
Why do some of your old pals call you Florence Nightengale?
I think that would be a question better posed to them…and most likely because they’re boneheads
What were or was your best university year(s) and why?
Hands down it would have had to be my Master’s year – 1994-1995. Somehow, despite the workload between school and work, I seemed to have the most amount of free time. Maybe it was just that after over 4 years in one discipline everything started to really converge together. Maybe I’d just started to learn to lighten up on myself a bit. Most likely a mix of the two I spent a lot of time studying and playing cribbage in the campus bar/coffee house…hours of cribbage. Spent a lot of time enjoying myself during that time – met Lulu that year and found one of my closest friends. A lot of my days started off headed over the Lulu’s to pick her up on my way to the campus, she’d make me breakfast (smoothies and oatmeal…separate not together ), and we’d head off to start our respective days. It was a crazy period – always on the go, a few downs and a lot of ups, but the one thing that stands out when I think back was how much that period was marked with laughter. Good times.
Did you ever fuck a student or a professor? Discuss in detail.
No – despite the times that I may have wanted to. I’ve always believed in the adage: don’t shit where you eat. Although, I do recall my first time teaching my own university class - it was a group of 175 and I was a whopping 25 years old. I had this one student - I'll never forget him...absolutely HOT...like mouth-watering, yummy, "hot". I couldn't look at him while I was lecturing or I'd forget what I was saying in mid-sentence...the whole thing was very disconcerting.
Talk about dealing with depression in your mid twenties.
I think in everyone’s life, at some point or another, life creates the circumstances that force us to kind of face ourselves – sometimes that’s brought on by a major change of life circumstance…a major health change, the loss of a career, the loss of a loved one, the loss of a relationship, whatever. For me, it came in the form of depression. It seemed, at the time, that everything went from being fine to shit overnight. But, in reality it was the result of a long process of me trying to deal, by not dealing with, my own “issues” – wherever those might stem from. I’d been trying to control my own emotions, my own emotional expression, for so long that I’d forgotten how to use those muscles. I could intellectualize my feelings, but I couldn’t just feel them. So I ended up numb…that’s when the depression hit. It was a bad time, the first few months were really black. I was existing – not living. There were days when I’d get up and would be sitting there thinking, “what do I have to do?”. The answer – “shower” – would come to mind and an hour or two later I’d still be sitting in the exact same spot. The same routine would occur with eating, sleeping. For someone who was always motivated, even hyper-motivated, all of a sudden I didn’t even have a desire to meet my basic needs. That’s when I realized that intellectualizing all of this, that trying to do it on my own, just wasn’t working. So I got help. I refused meds at the time – which made the process longer. I still felt like I could get a grip on whatever was going, with me, myself. I didn’t understand enough about brain chemistry and, how it changes in depression, to realize I was being a stubborn dumbass. I found a good therapist, well one I could afford anyway, and we talked...and talked some more...and some more after that. Read some good resources that put things in perspective; most especially, Victor Frankl’s. “Man’s Search for Meaning”. Pretty soon I found my feelings again – and I didn’t only “get” them in my head, but I started to "get" them in my gut. It seemed like a slow process, sometimes a little painful, but I got them all back. In the process, I got myself - the good, the bad, and the ugly – and it felt right. Best thing life could have ever done was to give me that kick in the ass that way.
Discuss how a good friend commited suicide.
This is gonna be a long one...there's a story leading up to it...and he deserves it. Cary was a great man – 5-foot nothing, weighed about as much as me, and was an incredibly brilliant, sensitive, kind, funny person. When we met, it seemed that he was at a stage of his life when things were really just about to take off for him – he’d gotten a full-time position, his PhD thesis had been accepted right off the bat at one of the major publishing houses, he seemed to be getting settled into a new city and expanding his social network. We started seeing each other a bit less then usual. He admitted then he was partying a little hard, but at the time I didn’t think anything of it beyond him taking some well-deserved time for himself. Then things started to change. When we would meet up or speak on the phone our conversations seemed to be getting stranger – he was convinced that his neighbors were spying on him so he moved out of his building complex, the same thing happened at his next place of residence. The stories became very odd and incredibly detailed – people were spying on him, the press was following him around trying to ‘discredit’ him, there were conspiracies being plotted against him at work. Keep in mind that these stories would come out in the middle of a perfectly normal conversation – we’d be talking about the news or work-related stuff or relationships, he’d slip into one of these ‘topics’, and then would revert back to being completely normal. I was getting concerned and had suggested he sees his doc and take some time off, but didn’t realize how bad things were exactly. The day he said that his neighbors were hiding a body upstairs and that he was hearing voices through the walls was the day a couple of us took him to the hospital. He was so freakin’ smart that he ran circles around the doctors – claiming that they were just ‘constructing’ this label of illness for him and that nothing was wrong. They wouldn’t commit him without his consent – which finally came shortly thereafter. He admitted himself into the hospital for cocaine-induced psychosis/borderline schizophrenia. When he got out, he pulled away. He wouldn’t return phone calls, refused to see anyone, took off for months and no one had a clue as to where he was. He returned to the city for a short time and was back in avoidance mode – but, I found out he was back finishing the last edits on his book – so I was hopeful. The next thing I knew there was a phone call. Cary’s car had been found parked in a national park by a major lake. Someone had noticed that the car hadn’t moved in 24 hours and that no one had returned to it. The investigation found his shoes and socks had been placed by a picnic table by the water. They found his body in the lake about 48 hours later. He drowned himself – it was a very Victorian way to go out, but if you knew Cary it was so him. No “last” note was ever found. After being mad and hurt and upset…this is what I think happened – I don’t think Cary killed himself because he was crazy. The one thing that Cary prized most in his life was his mind. I think that in a moment of lucidity he decided that, if he couldn’t have control over the part of himself that he valued most, then he didn’t want to be a part of this world. He kept himself alive long enough to get his book to the publishers – completed and ready for print. He never felt that book in his own hands though. The world lost a little bit of its color the day he took his life.
Where did you start in adult? Ever been asked to be content?
Since I answered a good portion of the first part of this in Question #10, I’m not going to repeat here other then to say it was in early 2001. I’ve never been asked to be content and have only had to deal with a couple of situations where someone assumed I was content and decided to get aggressive and be a real ass. Episode #1 was several years ago at one of the Miami shows – I’ll never forget how Purple Haze from WebcamCash came in like a den mother and swooped me out of that situation…I thought she was going to deck the guy heheh Episode #2 was at one of the Montreal shows recently – now that guy was a piece of work. Lulu and SexyScribe were there thankfully, as was Greg from 2Much. The minute I told Steve what happened he gave me a hug, told me not to worry about it and went over and straightened out the situation. In both of those situations, it wasn’t the assumption that I was content that bothered me – not at all, actually – it was the way I was treated because of that assumption. I have the utmost respect for the women (and men) who are the “content” of this business – they provide us with the means to make our living. I see it as a job they choose to do, not the whole sum of their being. Just like I don’t think I’m defined by my job. Just bothers me when people assume that if they are dealing with a model then that means they’ve been given license to be disrespectful.
Talk about working for traffic dude and how you got fired.
I started working with TrafficDude (Scott, Tony & Buzz) at the beginning of 2003. Scott and I had met about 6 months previously. When I found myself in need of change, I remember calling Paul Nash for some sound advice. The first person he said I should talk do was Scott – and that’s what I did. Next thing I knew I was in Vegas representing them at the Internext show. I spent a year-and-a-half with TrafficDude. During that time, I was responsible for assisting with the deployment of publishers, and for managing advertisers’ paid traffic campaigns over various sources. It was a fantastic learning experience for me. For anyone who’s spent any real time with Scott, or if you’ve heard him speak on some of our industry panels, then you know the depths of his intelligence, conviction, and integrity. Tony and Buzz are right up – two of the most incredible, hard-working men you could meet. Scott was always transparent with me, shared his experience, and let me be the sounding board to his ideas and plans. Tony used to get sick of hearing us ramble into the night during my visits I was never fired from TrafficDude – for the record, I’ve never been fired from a job. There came a point when they needed my position to be filled in-house. I was working remotely from Montreal at the time, and my dad’s health wasn’t great (we shortly afterwards found out he had prostate cancer). TrafficDude was located in Las Vegas. It just didn’t feel right to leave at that time, so I let Scott know that it wasn’t going to be possible. It was sad, but being who they were they completely supported my decision. They had a need that still needed filling though – so we decided that I would run my term out with them while we trained someone else, and in the meantime I would get myself organized. Scott, being Scott, even made a trip all the way up here during a winter snowstorm to help me brainstorm. Since my departure our relationship has remained solid. Best part about working with TrafficDude wasn’t just the experience – it was the fact that my operational family expanded - nothing beats that.
What did you do for Stats Canada?
Through 3 of my 4 undergrad years, I worked with the Canadian Center for Justice Statistics (CCJS). While there I worked with the Policing Division on a number of different projects – the biggest of which was an extensive, longitudinal study of homicides in Canada that ranged over a 30-year period. Prior to 1991, information on relationship between a homicide victim and their accused was slotted into 3 categories: family, marriage, or stranger/other – pretty lean pickings in terms of understanding the relational dynamics in homicides. Since the large majority of those relationships seemed to fall under the “stranger/other” there was, a commonly held perception, that the majority of homicides, in Canada, were committed by people unknown to their victims. So they developed a more comprehensive list of relationships between victims and their accused – there were just under 40 categories developed. My job was to go back into 30 years of police homicide files and newspaper articles to try to find a more accurate description of these relationships. The result of that study was that they found, in the majority of cases of homicide in Canada, that the victim and accused were known to each other in some way – they might have been neighbors or were seeing each other or were engaged in business together. Gave us a much more accurate view of the picture.
What was it like to teach at university?
I got my first part-time instructing position at age 25 – the class was “Introduction to Deviance” and there were 175 students…most of whom weren’t all that much younger then me…a couple who were far, far older. I was scared out of my wits…I swear you could hear my knees knocking that first day when I saw all of them piling into the auditorium. The mantra I kept repeating in my head was, “Show no fear…otherwise you’re fucked right from the get go.” Adults are a much different breed of student then kids – they don’t defer necessarily to authority right off the bat (even if you do hold their grade in your hand), and they tend to have more developed egos. I remember that they were all looking at me like I must be the teaching assistant for the class – when they found out I was their instructor for the semester the looks on their faces was priceless actually. To be honest, the first few lectures were a nightmare. I was uptight, trying to prove to them how much I knew, overcompensate for the age thing or the fact that they expected me to either be slack or a complete hardnosed bitch, blah blah…that didn’t last long. Once I realized that I really had nothing to prove, and that all I was doing was sharing the accumulation of my own knowledge about all this material, things started going much more smoothly – and I actually found myself really, really enjoying the whole exchange. One of the great things about teaching adults is that they HAVE ideas and they often aren’t afraid to share those. I taught a few different courses through my academic career – a big part of it was enjoyable and some of it very personally rewarding. The kinds of courses I got to teach were the “interesting”, “sexy” ones. It wasn’t all that hard to get people engaged. I learned as much from my students as I taught them, probably more ?
Where do you live? Why?
I’m located out of Montreal. Beyond the practical issues like close proximity to family and the love of my life being here, it’s just one of those cities you can’t help but fall in love with. I moved here 10 years ago and it took me all of a few weeks to know that it felt like home. For anyone who hasn’t visited Montreal…you need to. It’s such a completely unique place in North America. A beautiful, “smaller” city that boasts some of the best that life has to offer – it’s cosmopolitan, has great food, culture, fashion, a kick ass night life, and just an incredibly unique attitude. There’s no place like it.
What adult internet conventions do you attend? Which are your favorites? Least favorites?
Over the last 4 years, I’ve attended many of the major North American shows. My least favorite show would have to be the Vegas Internext – in no way am I trying to disparage AVN here. Not whatsoever, actually. I’m just not a huge fan of Vegas – going there, for me, is like going into super-sensory overload. Vegas is the kind of place I’d like to be on a real vacation…when wandering and getting lost in the casino is fun, when you’ve got time to get from point A to point B. Being there for a tradeshow where you’re scheduled and have to run around…well, at the end of it I always feel like I’ve run the gauntlet. In comparison, I always really enjoy the Florida Internext show because the whole vibe is quite the opposite. I appreciate they’re trying to serve both crowds and palates – just a personal preference. My all-time favorite of the shows would have to be The Phoenix Forum. The manner in which CCBill and its other sponsors have, show after show, taken care of the attendants at this show is phenomenal. I'm totally looking forward to next week!!! Next in line would be the GFY Webmaster Access shows (especially the ones previously held in Montreal and Toronto)
Who do you look up to in the online adult industry? Down on?
There are several people that I’ve come to admire and respect greatly in this business. I won’t name names given that I’m mostly likely to forget someone and feel like an ass later, but I will say that I’ve been fortunate to work with many of those people. Then there are many others who’ve set incredible examples through their professionalism, work ethic, integrity, business acumen and maybe most importantly through their ability to not take themselves too seriously in this business and the craziness that can come with it. Since when you say the “online adult industry” I assume you mean people that are earning their livings legitimately through the online adult industry – then I’d have to say no one.
How many people in online adult have you had sex with? How many have you seriously WANTED to have sex with?
I’m one of those firm believers that a private life is intended to stay just that – private. In terms of who I’ve seriously wanted to have sex with…I believe the only PC response would be…ALL OF YOU…hahahahaha
Why does everyone say you're squeaky clean? Fear?
Hahahahahahaha… “squeaky” clean isn’t exactly a way I’d describe myself, but if you mean that I try to treat people fairly and respectfully, and that I’ve never screwed anyone over then I guess I am. I think I’m a pretty regular person with my own faults, fallibilities, and probably what many would consider vices. I guess the reason Sleazy couldn’t find any dirt on me is because in a work situation I generally try to shelf those or at least reserve them for my personal time I’ve had a couple of “less-then-sweetums-best” moments at the shows but I’ve always managed to make an ass of myself in the privacy of my own room hehehe I’ve always worked for other people’s companies during my time in this biz – there’s a part of me that feels that if I’m traveling on someone else’s dime then, even if I’m having the time of my life, I’m still obliged to at least try put my best face forward during the times that I’m representing my company. As for fear – well, I think I’m the most unlikely person anyone should be afraid of. Unless you cross me or someone I care about
How do you roll a joint? - woops I mean a cigerette. Describe your technique.
Ok, let’s just say that someone had the desire to roll their own smoking products ;) … there is a technique that will not only facilitate that process, but also produce a properly smoke-able product – no runs, no leaks, none of that messy stuff. Given that I’m considering patenting the technique, I’d be a fool to describe it here ;) I will say this – start off with a clean working space, have the proper tools at hand…and, for goodness sake take some pride in your work...get rid of all the unsmokeables and debris in your smoking product.
. Where do you disappear to during shows?
Well, if I told you that it wouldn’t be disappearing hahahaha ? In actuality, I usually retreat to my room (of which only a handful of people know the location) either alone or with a friend or two for some down time. The go-go of a show can be exhausting sometimes and the energy from everyone is like an ongoing jolt for me. I’ve found if I don’t pace myself out, I end up getting run down by the end of a show. Even if I can just get an hour here or there through the course of a day to meditate or have a more quiet conversation with someone – well, that’s usually enough time to let me restore my batteries and get back out with everyone in good form ?
Talk about the 'big eyes' and how someone gets them?
I know where the question comes from and he is SO gonna get it LOL ? As such, my response is going to be – I have no freakin’ clue as to what you’re referring to.